


You Know I Don't Want to Be Free

by snowybluecat



Category: The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Mutual Pining, Pining, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-23
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2020-07-10 13:53:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19906774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowybluecat/pseuds/snowybluecat
Summary: Emma was like an island for her whole life; stranded, isolated, not even noticeable. It was like she never existed.That was until Alyssa Greene walked into her life.Song: "I Was An Island" by Allison Weiss





	You Know I Don't Want to Be Free

**Author's Note:**

> TW: homophobia

_I was an island before you came along_

That's what Emma was for her whole life: an island. Stranded, alone, isolated, no one to talk to, no one there to just be there for her. At one point she was pretty close to Kaylee, and she was almost positive that it was going to stay like that for a long time. She doesn't remember the last time she made a friend. She wished it would last forever, just having someone to be there for her, to support her, to make her feel like she wasn't alone.

Then the rumor came around that she was a lesbian.

In Indiana, being gay was the equivalent to the devil's work. The moment a rumor spreads around that you're gay, you better run, because the torment you're about to experience was barely escapable.

And that's what Emma had to deal with everyday.

Everyday at school would start off the same. She walks into the building, gets glares and insults from other people, goes to her locker and sees that it has been decorated with spray paint and teddy bears hung by their necks. But Emma was used to it by now. 

"It will end one day," she always reassured herself. "Maybe they will understand soon. Just breathe, and everything will be alright."

_Put your boat in my sand, hand in my hand_  
_Your heart in my songs_

That's when Alyssa Greene showed up.

Alyssa was one of the most popular kids at school, maybe _the_ most popular kid at school. She was a cheerleader, a member of the debate club, and her mom was the head of the PTA. She had curly brown hair that you would want to run your fingers through and dark eyes that you could easily get lost in. It was no wonder why she was so desirable. 

Emma wouldn't be lying if she said she was beautiful. She always noticed her in the hallways and at lunch talking to Kaylee and Shelby, usually talking about boys or whatever else teenage girls talk about these days. Of course, they would never notice her back, and if they did, they would just scoff and continue to ignore her.

Maybe it was just Emma, but it always seemed like Alyssa didn't mind her that much. In fact, she never picked on her or threatened her like everyone else did. Sometimes, Kaylee and Shelby would contribute to the amounts of graffiti on her locker, but Alyssa would try to stop them from what they were doing. Maybe she actually liked her and wanted to be friends?

No, that could never happen. Not to Emma. There was no way a pretty, popular girl like Alyssa could like Emma, a lonely little lesbian. Besides, it was obvious that Alyssa was straight. Her and Greg went as dates to homecoming earlier this year, so that obviously denies that she's gay too. 

"I don't have a crush on her," Emma would always repeat to herself. "I don't have a crush on her, I don't have a crush on her, I don't-"

**BOOM!**

Several pieces of peanut brittle scatter across the classroom. The scent of peanuts surround the class as the table in the center is covered in melted peanut brittle.

It just so happens that the person sitting at that table was Alyssa Greene herself.

"I-I'm so sorry!" the brunette apologized, looking at the several students staring at her. "I wasn't paying attention and I kind of panicked and all of a sudden it just exploded-"

The chemistry teacher sighed. "Alyssa, just be more careful next time. I can give you something else to work on while everyone else continues their experiments."

Emma couldn't help but smile. What was it about blowing peanut brittle that just seemed so cute? Was it the way that it's basically impossible to blow up peanut brittle? Was it the face Alyssa made when it happened? Was it the way she rambled after it? Was it because she just looked so adorable? Was it just because she was Alyssa and no one else?

Shit.

She had a crush on Alyssa.

_I was a fighter, and I was so brave_

Lunch period hit, which meant it was time for Emma to sit by herself and catch up with schoolwork. She sat down at a table in the corner that was barely noticeable and pulled out a book she needed to read for her English class. Time flew by surprisingly quickly until Kaylee and Nick came up to her.

"Hey Emma," Nick said, smirking at Kaylee. "Why are you sitting here all alone?"

Great. Another session of "hey guys, let's pick on Emma because we obviously don't know how to mind our own business."

Emma didn't even bother looking up from her book. "Because I want to, Nick. You must be happy that you have someone to sit with."

Kaylee joined the conversation. "I'm happy too, because Nick is my _boyfriend._ I bet if you had one, you wouldn't be sitting alone."

"But wait!" Nick added on. "There's no way you could have a boyfriend. You're a lesbo!"

Kaylee giggled. "And it looks like you're the only one too. Even if there _were_ other ones at this school, there's no way that they would ever want to date you, freak!"

And that's what broke Emma.

The thought of Alyssa, her new crush, being a lesbian made her stomach do all kinds of twists and turns. If she was, would she share the same feelings as her? Probably not, according to Kaylee.

Emma packed up her book and bolted out of the door, resulting in laughter throughout the cafeteria. She looked behind her to make sure no one was following her, and fortunately, nobody was there. It almost felt like somebody was, though. Weird. She rushed to the place where she goes to calm down and get her thoughts together: the band closet.

Luckily, no one was in there to witness her sobbing the moment she walked into the room and slump against the door. She never cried this much after being approached by students at the school. The fact that she now had a crush on Alyssa just made everything worse. Everything said by these students would never be the same again.

_But I lowered my sword when you held me and swore_  
_You'd stay, stay, stay, oh,_

A knock was suddenly heard.

"Hello? Emma? It's me, Alyssa."

What the hell? Why is she here? Is she going to further insult Emma and just make her life more miserable?

"Can I come in? It's not what you think, I promise."

Emma hesitated for a second, but after thinking it through, she replied.

"Yeah, come on in."

It almost felt like the whole room lit up the moment Alyssa walked in. Her dark curls, her dark eyes, and Emma may or may not have been staring at her soft lips.

"Hey, are you okay? I saw what happened in the cafeteria and I just wanted to check up on you."

It took Emma a while to fully process what was happening. Why was Alyssa here? Surely she was just sent by Kaylee or Shelby to just pick on her more. But no, she was trying to see if she was okay. What's going on?

"I'm... fine," Emma lied. "I just needed to calm down, so I came in here." She decided to get straight to the point. "Why did you come after me?" 

"Because I care about you! You know I can't stand it when people bully you all the time. It must be awful hearing all of those threats every single day. I'm just... I'm so sorry, Emma."

Before the blonde could even reply, the brunette wrapped her arms around her waist, making her almost melt in her arms.

_What did I do to deserve this?_  
_What did you do to me?_

This cannot be happening. This has to be a dream. Alyssa was hugging her, but why? The two have never even talked before, and all of a sudden Alyssa followed Emma into the band closet and started comforting her.

The blonde failed to hold back her tears. After what felt like an eternity, she let go of the girl holding onto her.

"I'm sorry, Alyssa."

"What? What are you sorry for?"

"I don't get it. Why are you suddenly caring about me when it's obvious that people at this school want me dead at this point? I just don't understand."

"Emma, listen to me. There are people in the world who care about you, including me. I was just too scared to talk to you because Kaylee and Shelby might suspect something. I've been worried about you since..." 

"Since people starting saying that I'm a lesbian? Well guess what, it's true, so you can just report back to your friends or whatever."

She did not mean to say that out loud. Well great, now Alyssa was going to confirm the rumor to Kaylee and Shelby, and then they're going to tell the whole school, and then the whole school is going to make Emma's life more miserable than it already was. 

"That's not going to change the way I feel about you. I trust you, and I've been wanting to be friends with you for a long time now. Do you trust me?"

An awkward moment of silence passed between them. At this point, there's no going back. If Alyssa truly felt this way about Emma, then maybe she can have someone to talk to again. She gathered her thoughts and broke the silence.

"Yes, I trust you, Alyssa."

The shorter girl smiled. "Okay, good. Can I have your phone? I want to add myself to your contacts. If you're okay with it of course."

The taller girl took out her phone and handed it to her, fidgeting with her hands as the other girl typed in her number.

"Just text me if you want to talk. I'll be more than happy to talk to you," Alyssa said as she handed the phone back to Emma.

Right when Emma was about to say something back, the bell rang. 

"Oh my god, I'm going to be late! Uh, I'll see you later, Emma. Text me, okay?" The brunette panicked as she ran out of the room.

_Baby, come back_  
_You know I don't want to be free_

Maybe this wasn't going to be a bad year after all.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_I was a rebel, but I had a cause_

Alyssa wasn't a huge fan of her mother. She was always expecting her to participate in extracurricular activities, make straight As, study as much as possible and eat healthy snacks only. Freedom's not a choice when you're Alyssa Greene. Her life was always going to be like this. If she makes a single B or gains just one pound, her mom would go insane.

Being popular wasn't all that fun to begin with. Everyday, people would approach her and try to ask her out, but it happened so often that she would just ignore them. She was never left alone at school and was constantly being surrounded by people all the time. Kaylee and Shelby didn't mind at all though.

She never really enjoyed the conversations she had with her friends. She always went along with what they said because she had a feeling they would get mad at her if she said something else. She was never into the topic of boys for some reason. The only reason she went to homecoming with Greg was because she had no one else to go with, and she was being pressured by everyone else to say yes. The thought of dating a boy never crossed her mind. Maybe there was something wrong with her.

_'Til you came to town, pushed me around,_  
_And showed me what love was_

Then there was Emma.

There was something about Emma that made Alyssa feel safe. Before the two even talked, she would sometimes sneak glances at her in class. She noticed that she would fidget with any nearby object. She noticed that she would doodle in the margins of her notebook. She noticed that she would have the most concentrated face when writing down notes or taking a test.

Was it wrong to say she looked really cute?

She always felt terrible whenever people made fun of Emma at school. The two were polar opposites, one being surrounded by people who hate her, and the other being surrounded by people who love her. Whenever Kaylee and Shelby bully Emma, she can't help but feel sorry for the girl. She never understood why being gay was a bad thing. Even if the rumor wasn't true, there was nothing wrong about it. At least to Alyssa.

So when Emma left the cafeteria on that day, Alyssa made sure the coast was clear and started following her to the band closet.

_I was a wolf, dear, apart from the pack_

A few weeks have passed since the meeting between Emma and Alyssa. The two have started to text more often and ended up meeting in the band closet everyday for lunch. All Alyssa had to tell her friends was that she had to use the bathroom or help tutor a student for their class. It was nice to be alone with someone else for once instead of the same crowd of people everyday.

The two would go on and on about whatever they talked about. Emma would usually talk about her favorite bands and tv shows, while Alyssa would complain about her family and friends.

"So how exactly did you blow up peanut brittle again?" Emma asked after taking a bite out of her sandwich, trying not to laugh just mentioning the topic.

"Emma, I don't know!" Alyssa said while hiding her embarrassed face in her hands. "I thought my lab partner was taking care of it, but she had no idea what to do either. The moment I looked away, it just blew up!"

"It's pretty amazing though, you have to admit."

The two laughed for a brief moment until the bell rang again, separating the two again for the rest of the day.

The only person Alyssa would think of for the rest of the day was Emma. She wished the times they spent in the band closet would last forever, considering how short lunch periods are and the little amount of classes they have together.

Later on that night, Mrs. Greene barges into her daughter's room, holding a sheet a paper with a big, red B at the top.

"Alyssa Greene, could you explain why you got a B on your chemistry test? Can you also explain why I got a call from your teacher saying that you failed an experiment during class?"

Alyssa rolled her eyes, but not to the point where her mother could see it. "Sorry, mom. I've just been so busy with cheerleading and debate club lately to the point where I barely have anymore time to study. Also, I stopped paying attention for a second during the experiment we did in chemistry and ended up failing it." She expected her mom to yell at her even more about it, but for once she was being understanding and didn't lecture her for five hours straight.

"That's okay, sweetie. But please, just remember to study more often and pay attention in class, okay?"

_But you answered my cries in the dead of the night_  
_And told me that you had my back, oh_

The next day, Alyssa had a plan. If she wasn't doing the best in chemistry, then maybe she could get someone to tutor her, and who else could tutor her besides Emma?

The girl excused herself from her friends once again and made her way towards the small room in the back of the hallway. Once she walked in, she dropped her backpack on the ground, took out her chemistry notes and shoved them in Emma's face without a proper greeting.

"I need you to tutor me for chemistry because I think my mom's really disappointed in me and I'm not doing well in the class so if you could help me that would be awesome-"

"Well hello to you too, Alyssa."

"Sorry, I just needed to rant there. Anyways, do you want to help?"

"Of course. Not to brag or anything, but I think chemistry's my best subject."

Grades weren't the only thing Alyssa's mom yelled at her about. She also yells at her about the food she eats and how she should never eat anything with sugar. This was the chance to complain about that too.

"Also, my mom never lets me eat anything considered 'unhealthy.' She completely banned sweets from our house and the most I can eat is maybe an apple, but that's it."

Emma looked at her for a few seconds and hands over the other half of her sandwich.

"I can start bringing food for you if you want. Trust me, my house is loaded with all kinds of treats."

The brunette accepted the sandwich and happily bited into it. It's been so long since she's had something that wasn't a salad or a few grapes.

"You're the best, Emma. Thank you."  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thanksgiving came around the corner and there was only a few minutes left until the longly awaited assembly at school.

Emma had no idea why she signed up to perform at this event. Perhaps she did it to help her with her stage fright? Whatever reason she did it for, she was going to perform the song _Imagine_ on her guitar in front of the entire school.

After a few performances, which consisted of singing and dancing, it was Emma's turn to come up on stage. Her hands were shaking and sweating, but that was expected knowing how much of an anxious person she already was.

Just breathe.

The sound of her footsteps echoed across the auditorium as she made her way to the stool in the center of the stage. She sat down with her guitar in her hands, trembling and looking at the audience.

"Um, hi. I'm Emma and I'm going to play _Imagine_ on the guitar. Uh, enjoy."

She took one last look at the audience and saw a familiar face: Alyssa. Just looking at her made her feel at ease, and it almost felt like it was just the two of them in that room together. She took a deep breath and started playing the first few chords.

Alyssa was mesmerized. The way Emma was playing her guitar was nothing like any other performance. She seemed so calm and focused when playing. Sure, she messed up a few times, but she still kept going. Her blonde hair and glasses shined in the spotlight, almost like an angel. The sound coming out of the guitar could instantly bring anyone to peace. Has Emma always been this beautiful?

The song finished and the audience clapped without a single word. The not-so-anxious-anymore girl walked off of the stage and sneaked a glance at Alyssa, who is clapping and grinning to the point where her hands and cheeks hurt. Looking at Emma suddenly made her stomach have millions of butterflies. What is this feeling? 

_I can't do this alone anymore_  
_'Cause I'm no good on my own anymore_

The day after Thanksgiving break was over, the two girls met up once again in the band closet. 

Alyssa walked in and saw Emma for the first time in a week. All of a sudden her stomach was doing backflips and her face started turning pink. 

"Hey," Alyssa said, trying to fight the blush in her face.

"Hi," Emma replied, noticing how tense Alyssa was being.

"So... did you have a good break?"

"Yeah, I spent a lot of time with my family as expected. You?"

"Same here."

Silence was exchanged between the two as they stared at each other. Alyssa's eyes kept flickering down to Emma's lips, and Emma's eyes kept flickering down to Alyssa's. The two always shared their feelings with each other whenever they had their sessions in the closet. If the silence was going to continue like this, Alyssa needed to confess how she felt. She couldn't take it anymore. She spent the whole break just thinking about Emma and only Emma. 

Alyssa broke the silence. "Um, you were really good at the assembly by the way." She took a few steps forward.

"Oh, uh, thanks. I messed up a few times, but thanks."

More silence. 

Emma couldn't help but stare at Alyssa. Her face was starting to turn red seeing her this close up. Her hair was the prettiest she's ever seen and she found herself admiring the darkness of her eyes. She got completely lost in them and didn't even notice her getting closer and oh my god Alyssa's kissing her.

Wow, her lips were soft. Every time she would look at them, she thought they would be soft, but now that she's actually kissing her, that's a whole different story.

_What did I do to deserve this?_  
_What did you do to me?_

But why? Emma was sure Alyssa was straight. If she was gay, she would be getting the same treatment from people at school as she was. This can't be right. There's got to be some type of misunderstanding.

Alyssa pulled away from the kiss and looked into Emma's hazel eyes. She's never seen a shade of hazel that gorgeous before and could stare at them all day. But right now, she needed to tell her how she felt (if the kiss wasn't obvious enough).

"I really like you, Emma," the blushing brunette mumbled. "The time we've spent together in here always made me so happy, and when you performed at the Thanksgiving assembly, I just fell for you immediately."

This was really happening. The girl that Emma has had a huge crush on since the beginning of the year finally felt the same way. She couldn't believe it at all.

She didn't realize she was staring at her in complete silence.

Alyssa's eyes widened in worry. "Emma? Oh god I'm so sorry I shouldn't have-"

Her sentence was cut off with another kiss. This was real. This wasn't fiction, this wasn't some type of alternate universe. This was reality, and in this reality, Alyssa liked Emma back.

Emma pulled away and smiles with tears glistening in her eyes.

"I like you too, Alyssa."

_Baby, come back_  
_You know I don't want to be free_

**Author's Note:**

> We all love these little lesbians.
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated!


End file.
